His Hope is My Will

“Sarah—Draw close to me.”~God.
“Why?,” I asked Him.

“Just trust me,” He said.

This was God’s message to me as I was taking a walk and listening to Bethel Music on my iPod one brisk evening.

I knew that God was on the move for me and that He was fighting for me….I just did not know how as my faith was so small at the time. ~”Why are ye fearful, O ye of little faith?”~(Matthew 8:26)~

As I was walking back to my apartment, I pictured the Lord planting a seed inside of my heart. Why was this seed significant? It symbolized the hope that I had in Christ Jesus. “Which hope we have as an anchor of the soul, both sure and stedfast, and which entereth into that within the veil.”~(Hebrews 6:19)~

I shut the door of my apartment and went to my bedroom. I tried to sleep, but could not, so I decided to spend time with the Lord in prayer. Then, I began to cry silently to God. My crying grew louder as I wept bitterly. I questioned God as to why He was allowing me to go through this rough season as I was facing many financial struggles, no job, ongoing issues with my best friends and family, and the spiritual warfare and opposition from friends and family against me going on my mission trip to serve Him and Japanese women and children in Japan. Tears poured down my face as I wept in my broken state of heart. ~”Jesus wept.”~(John 11:35)~

Despite the many tears I shed, I knew that even if my closest friends and family members thought that this hope that the Lord God had given me was nothing more than wishful and fanatical thinking that it gave me the strength to abide in the hope of Christ. It was then that I remembered my life Bible verse:

“I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.”~(Philippians 4:13)~

At that moment, I was able to crack a smile through the tears and emotional pain that I was experiencing. While God was breaking my heart for what broke His, He was able to turn my sadness and grief into joy unspeakable. This joy became my strength! 😀 ~”…for the joy of the Lord is your strength.”~(Nehemiah 8:10)~

It was then that I knew what it meant to rejoice in my sufferings. There is hope for us, as followers of Christ, when we choose to surrender His will to be our will. I let His will be my will out of broken surrender and selflessness instead of self. ~”O my Father, if this cup may not pass away from me, except I drink it, thy will be done.”~(Matthew 26:42).

I went to bed as the Lord lay me down to sleep. It is well with me now. My joy rests in the Lord as I dwell in His presence with this final thought sent from heaven to me: