Loved and Wonderfully Made

I am praying. I am praying for a miracle.

About two weeks ago, I thought that the Lord healed me of Bi Polar Disorder. It turns out that God did not heal me. This greatly discouraged me. I felt as if the enemy and all of the forces of hell defeated me.

~”For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.”~Ephesians 6:12, ESV~

I know that Bi Polar Disorder is not of God. I also know that God can use any physical or mental illness, or any good or bad thing, for His good and greater glory. I had to surrender all of me to the Lord so that He could use me in spite of my mental illness.

I had a dream recently. One of my good friends from my church was praying to the Lord and wearing a white dress and kneeling before the Lord as she was gazing up at the sky. She saw stars falling from the sky and the sky was very red. The church that the both of us go to was burning on fire with the Holy Spirit. She was crying out to God with tears coming down her face. She reached an outstretched hand towards me and said with tears in her eyes, “Don’t go away!.” as she saw a hand of the enemy pull me away from her and into a dark place.

I believe that when she said this statement that God was using my friend to warn me to not go into a dark place and to not give into the dark forces of the enemy in spite of my Bi Polar Disorder. The enemy is trying to use my Bi Polar Disorder for his way and God is trying to use my Bi Polar Disorder for His good.

I cried out to God in my bedroom a few days ago with the prayer that God would heal me. I know that God sees me as beautiful. I know that God sees me as loved and wonderfully made. It is hard for me to accept that about myself sometimes because I choose, at times, to see myself through the lenses of my Bi Polar Disorder and not how God sees me.

~”I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well. “~Psalm 139:14, KJV~

It is in these moments that I can choose: to see myself as loved and wonderfully made, or to see myself negatively and in the way that the enemy wants me to see myself. I choose to see myself as a loved child of the King of kings and Lord of lords so that the name of Christ is magnified all the more!

God loves me. God so loved me that He sent Jesus to die for me and rise from the grave for me. I have a reason to praise the Lord for my salvation today! He died for me so that I can have the gift of salvation through His grace!

~”For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith–and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God–not by works, so that no one can boast.”~Ephesians 2:8-9, NIV~

I am thankful to God that I have salvation in His only Begotten Son. The King of kings and Lord of lords is my Savior. I have salvation in Christ today! It is for this reason that I can rejoice because I am loved and wonderfully made!

What about you? Whether you are reading this blog post out of curiosity, or because you too have a physical or mental illness, or if the Holy Spirit of God led you to this blog post on purpose, my hope is that you will take away after reading this that you are loved. Loved. So Loved. And wonderfully made.

Agape Love/Forgiveness

I love to walk. I love to walk with the Lord.

Walking with the Lord has been an incredible and rewarding journey for me. I learn a lot and something new each day from God. His Holy Spirit teaches me the things that are of Him and the things that are not of Him so that I know the difference.

~”But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, he will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you.”~John 14:26, ESV~

Knowing the difference is the key for me in my walk the the Lord so that I know right from wrong, good from evil, and Godly from ungodly. Every day is a learning experience for me from the Lord.

Right now, I am learning to walk in love with others. Recently, a co-worker said some really mean remarks about me openly and indirectly. She called me, “another random person.”

I immediately stopped what I was doing and heard what the co-worker said about me. I felt sad, but then I stopped to think about what the Word of God says in regards to feelings and convictions.

~”Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense.”~Proverbs 19:11, ESV~

Of course, the remarks that the co-worker said were wrong. But, it is in the glory of the Lord to overlook an offense. God commands us to quickly forgive and overlook offense so that we can be slow to anger.

I remembered this Scripture. Even though I was tempted to say something back to my co-worker, the Lord told me to remain silent and pray for her. I silently prayed for this co-worker as I continued to work throughout the day. This pleased God.

I even prayed for this co-worker during my quiet time this morning. Then, I let it go by surrendering this co-worker’s offense to the Lord. I am quick to forgive. I thank God that He gave me the strength and willingness to forgive this co-worker. The choice that I made to overlook this person’s offense is glorious to God.

~”Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him, and if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him.”~Luke 17:3-4, ESV~

I praise the Lord that He gave me the ability to remain silent as my portion rather than to talk back to my co-worker. I thank God that He got me through another day at work. I can do anything with God by my side. With Him, it is possible to repent. With Him, it is possible to extend forgiveness to others. With Him, it is possible to love your neighbor that curses you, even when you bless him or her right back.

~”You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against the sons of your own people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the Lord.”~Leviticus 19:18, ESV~

God is so good! I praise Him for the power of love and forgiveness to my fellow neighbors, including my co-worker, so that I can be the witness and testimony of Jesus to her.

Praise Immanuel! Praise be to God! Thank You Jesus! Hallelujah!

 

Resting in Prayer

Waiting. Waiting can be tough. Waiting on God can be tough, especially during this time of the Coronavirus pandemic. 

Lately, I’ve been feeling lonely. Being in quarantine and isolation for so long has taken its toll on me, mentally and emotionally. But, through it all, I continue to claim the promises of God. 

~”Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”~Matthew 19:26, NIV~ 

At 3:00 a.m., I wake up in the morning to pray. I pray for at least three to four hours straight (I’ve been praying during this time a lot lately so that I can cope with anxiety). One of the things that I have been praying to God for is that He will end this Coronavirus pandemic. I know that it will be in the timing of God when it ends, but I still worry. 

How long, God, will it go on? How long, God, can I carry on? How long can I go without talking to people from my church in person on a regular basis? 

Very recently, I tried to text one of my friends who used to attend my church. She has not texted me back for a really long time and this has caused me to worry, especially during this time of quarantine and isolation during the Coronavirus pandemic. 

While this makes me feel really sad, I trust God. This makes me feel forgotten and rejected, but I know that my approval comes from God. I am not saying that I hate this person for choosing to not text me back, but it is very hurtful when people of the church lack the maturity to reply back to my messages when all that I am asking for is prayer during this time of quarantine and isolation of the Coronavirus pandemic. 

My prayer is that the Holy Spirit of God will teach this person how to be a better friend. At the same time, I am not accountable or responsible for the actions of others. I pray that God will convict my friend soon because I do not know how much longer that I can wait on God to move mountains that must be moved, in the name of Jesus Christ. 

It is in these moments that as my mind worries, I pray out loud in my bedroom. I pray for God to intervene in the world, because like me, you must be weak, weary, and tired. But, there is hope: You can place your rest in Jesus Christ. 

~”Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”~Matthew 11:28-29, ESV~ 

Jesus has your back. Jesus saves you in the power of His rest. And He is here with you and fightng this battle called Coronavirus. He has already overcome it. I cannot say when this pandemic will be over, but He has already overcome it and because of this truth, we have victory! 

I am even confident that God is purifying His church during this hard and trying season so that people can catch up in meeting with God. Do not worry! God is with you. God is with us. God is with the world! 

I praise God for the work that He is doing in my life. I thank God for the work that He is doing in America and the world. Praise the Lord! Thank You Jesus! Hallelujah! 

Peace of God in my Heart

I thank God for peace. I thank God for peace, in the name of Jesus Christ.

As I pray to God during my quiet times with Him, I thank Him for providing me with His peace, that surpasses my understanding, of the future and what is to come.

~”For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”~Jeremiah 29:11, NIV~

I believe with conviction that God has called me to be an author and a counselor. These callings on my life have immensely blessed me as the Lord God has shown me of the future that is to come as a result of these great callings that He has on my life.

One reason that I believe that God has called me to become an author is because God has gifted me with the talent of writing. Writing is one of my many talents that God has given me, beside a wise and discerning spirit. I enjoy writing because with it, I can glorify God through this tool.

I write on blog posts and as a news editor for Atlanta Christian Voice. I am very blessed that God called me to set up this blog website, ‘Sarah’s Spiritual Walk,” after I went on a missions trip to Lebanon a couple of years ago. I am also immensely blessed that the Father called the president of One Christian Voice to choose me to become the news editor for Atlanta Christian Voice.

Several months ago, I was interviewed by a Christian broadcast television network for my missionary works in Lebanon, Japan, and Uganda. I was also interviewed regarding how I became a news editor for Atlanta Christian Voice and I explained in the interview how God made me to become the news editor and how God is growing the business. I thank the Lord for moments like these because I can glorify God in these special moments!

I also believe that God has also called me to become a counselor because I have been through many hardships of which I believe that my future clients can relate to and that I can provide counsel to through the Word of God. I am currently in the Liberty University online program for my third Master of Arts degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling. I am halfway through the program and do not graduate until the Fall 2021.

Even after I graduate, I still intend to become a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC), in the state of Georgia. In this way, a few years later, I will be known as Sarah A. Dickens, LPC. Praise the Lord!

I still have a long way to go before I graduate. With the Lord Jesus holding my hand, I have peace that surpasses all understanding. I have peace in the future and what it holds. My future is in the Lord’s hands! Amen!

~”Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me–put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.“~Philippians 4:8-9, NIV~

 

My Hope is in Christ

I am hopeful. I am hopeful in Christ.

I’ve been through rough times before. Plenty of times. Currently, I am beginning to question the unknown and why God is allowing for certain things to happen in my life. I trust and know that God has great plans for me, but am uncertain about my future with my current friendships.

“Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me.”~John 14:1, ESV~

Lately, I have been very troubled. I have not heard from many of my friends from church since the Coronavirus pandemic began. While I do acknowledge that I have not done my part, as a member of the Body of Christ, by reaching out to them, I also acknowledge and truthfully say that they have not done their part either. Even when I do my part and text certain friends, they do not text me back. This makes me really and and deeply grieved. But, it reminds me at the same time that Jesus faced rejection.

I have been feeling as if not many of my friends from church care about me. And it is when I have been rejected and when friends from church choose to reject me that I believe in God and am thankful for what Christ did for me on the cross.

Jesus died for the rejection that I face. Jesus died for the sadness and grief that I feel. Jesus died for the pain that I feel. Memories with my friends from church may last for a season, but a relationship with Jesus Christ is for a lifetime.

I am in no way saying that I am ungrateful for the friendships that I currently have. I am just really sad that none of them, from my perspective, see me as worthy of friendship or a valuable person of significance. It is in these moments that when reality hits me hard with sadness and grief that I see my significance in the Lord Jesus Christ.

I am significant to God. I don’t have to be significant to my friends from church. I am loved by God. I don’t have to receive love to gain approval from my friends from church. I am cherished by God. I don’t need to hear from my friends to church for me to feel a certain way (happy, content, etc.).

I forgive my friends from church for not reaching out to me. At the same time, I forgive myself for not doing my part, as a member of the Body of Christ, for not reaching out. I pray that this moment will teach me how to be a better friend and that my friends from church can inquire of the Lord in prayer how they can treat me better and as a good friend.

I am thankful to God for the revelation that He has given me over the years concerning my life. I know that I have a calling and that God has plans for me that are different from my friends from church. I just have to trust in Him and know that perhaps rejection from my friends from church is a sign from God of redirection.

I am not letting go of my friends from church. In fact, I will continue to pray for them, as I always do in my quiet time. I praise God for the memories that I have made with them over the years. I will always cherish them.

I am now at peace with God and myself. I thank God for this peace that I feel that He gave me. I am no longer troubled or afraid of the future and what it holds. Thank You Jesus!

A Star is Birthing

I woke up early this morning. I woke up early this morning to pray.

As I woke up early this morning to pray, the Holy Spirit of God began to speak to me concerning my book, which I have written. I am currently in the process of finding a publisher for my book, but I am trusting God that He will provide me with a publisher in His timing.

~”He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.”~Ecclesiastes 3:11, NIV~

I had a vision as I was praying. One of my friends from church knelt in front of me on the ground and gave me a star from the sky. As I asked the Lord about the star and this vision, He let me know, by the power of His Holy Spirit, that the star represents my future and destiny. I have victory in Christ because the Lord has granted me power of the Holy Spirit to walk on into my destiny and the plans that He has for my future.

As I have prayed over the years, the Lord showed me that my destiny in Christ has two parts: I am called to be an author and am I chosen to be a counselor. This is all a part of the will of God because these are desires that God Almighty put in my heart to become an author and to become a counselor. I love how the Lord can speak so clearly to my heart through this vision, for such a time is this.

I believe in my heart that God has called and chosen me on this earth for a plan and a purpose. I also believe that God loves me so much that He has called and chosen me to walk healed and to walk in freedom, in the name of Jesus Christ. God is so good!

I continued to pray for a little over two hours this morning. It was a lovely time that I spent with the Lord this morning. I reflected upon the vision that God showed me and thanked the Lord for showing me in the season that He showed me. His timing is always on time and right! Indeed!

~”For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”~Jeremiah 29:11, NIV~

I am excited and cannot wait for my book to be published. I cannot wait for this to come to pass and am trusting and waiting on God in this process. I also am excited and cannot wait to start my classes for the second half of my journey at Liberty University to become a counselor. I am set to graduate in the Fall 2021 and am praying over this date, in the name of Jesus Christ.

God is good. He is always faithful to me. I cannot wait for the testimonies that are unfolding in this process. Hallelujah and amen!

Walk On/Starting Today/Amen

I thank God. I thank the Lord for His resurrection power.

This morning, I experienced many breakthroughs as the Lord God granted me His resurrection power, as my portion. This is just the beginning and the end is far from near to me.

~”For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.”~2 Timothy 1:7, KJV~

As I was praying this morning, I could feel the healing power of God circulating through all parts of my body: my heart, my mind, my soul, and my spirit. I did not understand why the Lord would allow for me to experience this healing, so I asked God about it and He showed me a vision as I was praying.

In this particular vision, I was on a beach with clear blue water, clear blue waves, and a sandy shore. It was as if Heaven was brought on earth as it is in Heaven. I had holes in my hands and feet, where I had been crucified (figuratively speaking), many times of my life. I passed by one of my friends from church as I was walking along the sandy shore. I gave her a hug and as I gave my friend a hug, she witnessed the healing power of God through my wounds on my hands and on my feet. It was incredible!

~”But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.”~Isaiah 53:5, KJV~

As I walked away from my friend, she cried happy tears as if she were praising and celebrating with the Father of the resurrection power that Christ Jesus granted to me to walk in His healing and feel His deliverance. It was so beautiful and so marvelous!

After the Lord showed me this vision, I continued to pray and continued to listen to Christian music on my phone. I praised the Lord for granting me the gift of His resurrection power and to walk in it. I am a child of God: healed, set free, and delivered. Praise the Lord!

It was as if I was walking along the sandy shore in this vision that God was elevating me in a renewed sense of strength and a renewed sense of peace as I experienced this resurrection power of Christ this morning. I will never forget this moment. Amen!

~”For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.”~Philippians 1:21, KJV~

~”I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.”~Philippians 3:14, KJV~

~”I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.”~Philippians 4:13, KJV~

I thank the Lord for His promise of resurrection power that He showed me today! I praise Jesus for empowering me through His Holy Spirit so that I can walk in this resurrection power today. Starting today. Thank you Jesus! Hallelujah! Amen!

 

 

 

Peace of God Within Me

I like to pray. I like to  pray in my bedroom.

As I pray in my bedroom, I can feel the presence of God elevating me to Heaven. As the Holy Spirit of God elevates me to Heaven, I feel at peace with God and with myself.

~”Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”~Philippians 4:6-7, NIV~

This peace that I feel is calming. This peace that I feel is soothing to my heart, my mind, my body, my soul, and my spirit. This peace that I feel brings me into the presence of Almighty God. Oh, how I enjoy feeling this peace of God!

This peace of God brings me in complete unity with the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit of God, the full Trinity of Christ. This peace makes me healed, whole, and delivers me from the devil and other forces of darkness at work. As I put this peace of God into action, I have faith that others who God puts into my life will experience it too.

I currently work at a childcare facility as I study to become a counselor with my university full-time. One time, I was reading a couple of books to four of the children in the young toddler classroom of the childcare facility. I noticed that as I was reading these books to them that they were very occupied with me reading to them. I also noticed that they were feeling at peace with God and with themselves as I was reading books to them.

The lead teacher of the classroom noticed the peace of God that filled the atmosphere of the classroom and told me as soon as the classroom got down to one child, “The children seem to enjoy you reading to them!”

This comment that the lead teacher made me feel at peace with God and myself because I knew that I was doing the work of the Lord during that moment. I knew, in that moment, that the work of the Lord was accomplished!

~”Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.”~Philippians 4: 8-9, NIV~

I shall continue to fix my thoughts on all of the above: whatever is deemed by the Lord to be true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, and praiseworthy. I shall also put the peace of God into practice in all that I do for the Lord. Peace of God fills me up. It surpasses all negative emotions so that others can be filled up with the peace of God too. Praise the Lord! Hallelujah!

 

Ball-room Dancing in Heaven with Jesus

I can see Heaven. I have my days, where I see Heaven opening up for me.

The Lord has been very good to me. When I see Heaven opening up for me, I lift up my hands and begin to praise the Lord!

~”Praise the Lord! Praise God in his sanctuary; praise him in his mighty heavens! Praise him for his mighty deeds; praise him according to his excellent greatness! Praise him with trumpet sound; praise him with lute and harp! Praise him with tambourine and dance; praise him with strings and pipe! Praise him with sounding cymbals; praise him with loud clashing cymbals! Let everything that has breath praise the Lord! Praise the Lord!”~Psalm 150:1-6, ESV~

One of the ways that I praise the Lord is through ball-room dancing. Before the Coronavirus pandemic hit the United States of America (my home country), I would go and ball-room dancing with my friends from my church. We would go to ball-room dance socials at local churches or at gatherings, where ball-room dance socials were happening.

I really like ball-room dance socials because they give me the chance to spend time and fellowship with my sisters and brothers in Christ. I talk with my brothers and sisters in Christ to see how they are doing and talk to them about the good that the Lord is doing in my life in that moment (school, church, community, etc.).

I also like ball-room dance socials because they are a therapeutic outlet for me to experience the healing power of God, inside out. I have been through many traumatic things and even though these traumatic events were bad, God was able to use them to glorify Him and His Son, Jesus Christ, through means of ball-room dancing. Whether I do the waltz or fox trot, I glorify God through means of ball-room dancing in all that I do for the Lord.

A final reason why I like ball-room dance socials is because ball-room dancing is one of my favorite hobbies. Ball-room dancing is one of my favorite hobbies because I can use it to glorify God and His Son, Jesus Christ, in all that I do for Him. I have always liked ball-room dancing, since one of my friends from church introduced me to it a couple of years ago, and have loved it very much since then, as I use this God-given talent and hobby to glorify God.

So, whenever I look up at the sky, I think about the Lord. I meditate on His goodness. I also think about what Heaven will be like for me, as a believer in Christ, and if there will be a palace in Heaven, with men and women of different countries of the world, giving glory to God through ball-room dancing. If that is so, then I will gladly dance away for the Lord. I shall dance away for the Lord as every knee, every tribe, and every tongue give glory to God through means of ballroom dancing.

~”So that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.”~Philippians 2:10-11, ESV~

When I ball-room dance in Heaven, I shall confess that Jesus is Lord of my life. That shall be a testimony in and of itself. Amen!

Eternity in the Lord

I am special to God. I am very near and dear to God just as Jehovah is near and dear to my heart.

Whenever I look at the sky above me, I think about the goodness of the Lord. The clouds remind me of His greatness and majesty. The sun reminds me that God is closer to us than we could even imagine.

“You are the Lord, you alone. You have made heaven, the heaven of heavens, with all their host, the earth and all that is on it, the seas and all that is in them; and you preserve all of them; and the host of heaven worships you.”~Nehemiah 9:6, ESV~

Even as I continue to look at the sky, I worship God. I worship God because He gave me abundant life. It is because of this abundant life that I walk in that I praise the Lord for providing me with eternal life. I walk in the abundant life and I walk in the eternal life.

To me, the abundant life is what God provides me here and now on this green earth. It reminds me of the life that Jesus lived while on this green earth. I walk in the abundant life because Jesus died for me so that I could have an abundant life on this green earth before the Lord calls me home.

The abundant life reminds me of what eternal life will be like when the Lord God calls me into Heaven, my eternal home away from my home on earth. I think about the abundant life as I worship God on this green earth in the present. I meditate on the abundant life as I praise the Lord for giving me the abundant life through His Son, Jesus Christ. It is because of these truths that I stand victorious at the foot of the cross of Jesus Christ and praise the Lord for this magnificent sacrifice.

~”For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”~John 3:16, NIV~

The abundant life is a clear reflection of eternal life as I meditate on this truth on this green earth. I am constantly reminded, as I continue to look up at the sky, that my home is not this green earth, but that it is in Heaven with my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. The hope that I have and speak of is found in His eternal life that He gave to me, as a gift, at the cross. This is the sign of hope. This is also a sign of eternal hope.

I thank God for giving me the abundant life through Christ Jesus so that I can walk in eternal life in Him. I stand in the confidence that I will walk in eternal life when God says to me, “The time is now to come home. Welcome home, my faithful daughter!,” into His arms. Bless the Lord for this amazing truth! I can’t wait until that day of eternal life, in the name of Jesus Christ! To God be the glory! Amen!